Review Of Birthday Cakes In Uk Can Anyone Please Help Me Review This Journal Entry My Sister Wrote?

Can anyone please help me review this journal entry my sister wrote? - review of birthday cakes in uk

Need some help to correct a journal entry from my sister wrote yesterday, and I thought that someone could look at and correct the journal entry, she wrote to me to help and teach him how to improve their writing. Any constructive criticism is welcome. It is therefore not just say a diary of their right to work of my mother, my sister do to better read not in your letter, so you do not tell me his diary = [

Today is Sunday, June 28.2009. My family and I stayed at home. My sister goes to work at seven clock when I say om wok dinner on his birthday, because my Dad. In fact, his actual birthday, my father was the 6th June, and is the second time that we celebrate his birthday. I know its strange to have two birthdays, but my mother says I've got three-year anniversary. A birthday is the day of his actual birthday and the other two on the anniversary of his birth in China. Eighteen hours watching my mother had finished making dinner, my brother and I had the table, while my sister went somewhere. Before we ate dinner at my sister came home with her boyfriend. After dinnerMy sister was a freezer of ice cream cake for my father. The CAE was the Baskin Robbins ice cream and ice cream cake was two. The top layer is Vanilla Ice Cream and the bottom layer of chocolate brownies. if all the food ready, and my sister went to work. I had to clean the table and had my brother to wash the dishes.

I am also grateful to me as well say this journal entry was from a scale of 1-10, is written 1 = worst and 10 being excellent]